Stamping Out Hate in Jersey: An Interview with LaQuetta Nelson

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Editor's Note: LaQuetta Nelson is the chair of the board of directors of the Newark Pride Alliance in Newark, New Jersey. She is a former officer of Local 1377 of the Amalgamated Transit Union, a military veteran and a foudner of the New Jersey Stonewall Democrats. Last November she received a national award given to outstanding grass roots activists from the National Lesbian and Gay Task Force.

PA: Can you talk about what the Newark Pride Alliance is and its purpose?

LN: The Newark Pride Alliance was founded last year by myself and James Creel following the murder of Sakia Gunn. We realized in observing everything that took place following Sakia’s murder that there was a need in the African American LGBT community in Newark for some organization that would address the needs of that community. Hence part of the larger problems that resulted in Sakia’s murder is that young people feel as though they have to go to New York to have a place where they can feel accepted and safe. In Newark there is no place for young gay and lesbian folks to gather where they can feel safe, accepted, where they can be nurtured and cared for. Many of them have said that they don’t feel comfortable going to the YM/WCA where a lot of kids go or whatever recreational centers are still open. They don’t feel comfortable going there because the other kids make fun of them, call them names or beat them up. Many adults do not do anything to protect them. They really have nothing and no one that cares about them. James and I decided to call all of the leaders together to work on trying to bring some relief. We’re still in the process of working on building this organization. We want the Newark Pride Alliance to be an organization that is around for a long time. We’re planning to use the Pride Alliance as the organization that will work to bring folks together to create a community center with special emphasis on programs for young folks.

PA: How does the Newark Pride Alliance work to turn the tide against anti-gay violence?

LN: We believe that through education we can reduce the amount of violence against the LGBT community. Many have for so long had this image of gay and lesbian folks placed in their minds by people who are hateful and do not understand what it is to be an LGBT person. Right now our fight is with right-wing extremists who’d like to see all of us just die and disappear. But that’s not going to happen. We’re planning to have a series of activities based on educating the people of Newark so that they can get to see who we really are, that we are already people who they know. We have families here. We belong to families. We’re co-workers. Many people already have a level of respect for us. For many who are in the closet, these people just don’t know that this wonderful person that does this great job and is so kind and a caring happens to be a lesbian or a gay man or a bisexual person or a transgendered person. Some people when they find that out feel as though they can treat you differently; that it’s OK to disrespect you, to say mean and hurtful things and do harmful things.

PA: So their whole attitude toward you can change?

LN: Yes, it can change. It can change in a short amount of time. My thinking is that first of all they need to have someone that’s out. I’m an out lesbian, and I want them to see that I’m a decent person. I care about my people. I care about my community. I care about the town that I live in, and it hurts me to see the violence that takes place in the streets. I’m speaking about the violence overall not just the violence against the lesbian and gay community. There are things that need to be discussed that many of the so-called leaders now are not willing to discuss: they are not courageous enough. One of the activities that the Pride Alliance is planning is an anti-oppression conference in New Jersey where we discuss racism, sexism, homophobia, domestic violence, violence against the youth and children. We want to get together and talk about things in a way that will allow us to arrive at positive solutions. Then, we as citizens can assist our leadership in making it happen.

As part of our mission we also want to work with other groups who want to make Newark a viable and prosperous place for all of its citizens, not just for the wealthy, not just for the straights, not just for the whites, not just for the males, not just for the adults. We want this to be a good place for all the citizens of Newark. If you walk down the streets of Newark and look into the eyes of the people, some of them look lost. They look like they’ve lost hope. We at the Newark Pride Alliance are hoping to work in coalition with other groups to bring hope back to the people in this town.

PA: What support have you gotten outside of the LGBT community?

LN: Short of encouragement from a couple of groups, nothing. But that, we hope, will change as we go along. It’s still in the growing process.

PA: I also read you received an award from the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force.

LN: That was a great honor for me because as a community leader at the grass roots level, you do what you do because you know that there is a need that has to be filled. You do it without looking for anything in return. You do it for love of your people; for love of the town you live in. So when I came home one evening and had a message from the director of the Task Force that they wanted me to come to Miami, Florida to their annual Creating Change Conference to receive the Anderson Prize, I was taken aback because I had never done any work with the Task Force before. I had no idea that they were aware of what I was doing. When they mentioned that with the award came a $10,000 check, it touched my heart in such a way. I had founded the New Jersey Stonewall Democrats and I served as president of that organization for three years and had just retired from that aspect of my activities in March [2003]. I got re-involved with what’s going on as a result of Sakia’s murder. I had invested a great deal of my own time and finances which I never expected to get back. It just made me feel really special that they saw and understood what I was trying to do and wanted to assist me in being able to continue the work. It was an exciting opportunity and an experience I’ll never forget.

The theme of their conference was creating an anti-racist movement within the LGBT movement. I was in heaven when I saw that because I’ve been trying to talk to folks here for that whole time I was involved with the Stonewall Democrats. We need to discuss race; we need to discuss sexism. No one was willing to deal with those issues. Some people think that when you don’t discuss issues, they’ll go away or work themselves out. But I don’t think that’s so. I think we need to have open dialogue on it and include everyone in the discussion. So we need to have access to all that wonderful leadership.

PA: What is, in your view, needed to build greater unity in the LGBT community across racial lines?

LN: Well, I think that the people who are in the majority need to have a clear understanding of their privilege and how in exercising their privilege, privilege is denied to others and how that affects those others and ultimately how it affects the place where we live. We need to have some open honest discussion. I know that it can happen because it happened in Miami, Florida and I know it can happen here in New Jersey. I have a commitment from the Task Force to, once we set that up, send facilitators who will assist us in that discussion. My feeling is that we need to stop all the divisions, people and groups being set apart. Each group has a piece of the puzzle and a piece of the answer. We need to bring all of these people together to work on the issues that underlie the violence. Because when the level of oppression increases, the level of violence increases. We have to take a look at what are the oppressive forces that are at work here: racism, sexism, homophobia, domestic violence, in some ways, capitalism and classism. These are forces that are oppressing a lot of people, and to the extent that they are not aware that they are being oppressed. This is causing the young people to hit the streets; and who they think is the enemy is not the enemy. We have to get to the young people and redirect them and show them how to fight for the things they need in their schools, in their community, so that they can be safe, healthy and grow up with a happy young life.

So this discussion about oppression is at the root of why crime is on such an increase. They say in the papers that the crime rate has gone down, but when you are out on the streets you can’t tell that. People in the streets can’t tell that the crime rate has gone down. I have been in gatherings Newark, Irvington and East Orange of people who have had family members and friends murdered. We have to do something about this. There’s too much suffering going on.

Included in the issue of violence is the violence perpetrated through war. Many of the young folks that are over there fighting in Iraq and all the other places where the US military is are poor white, African American, Hispanics and people from the working class. People in the upper class are not allowing their young people to join the military right now.